Another Taper Distraction: The Proust Questionnaire

I’ve been blogging for several months now, but I haven’t revealed much of my personality along the way. Most of my posts have been about running, although I do believe what one says about running can reveal a great deal about his or her character.

See? No personality here. None.

See? No personality here. None.

At any rate, in keeping with my efforts to distract myself through taper, I thought it would be fun to take a stab at the Proust Questionnaire, developed in response to questions answered by writer Marcel Proust at the turn of the 20th Century, but popularized more recently by Vanity Fair magazine.

So, here goes. Don’t judge, please.

Proust Questionnaire:

  1. What is your idea of perfect happiness? Utter satisfaction.
  2. What is your greatest fear? Losing my children.
  3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? Self-doubt.
  4. What is the trait you most deplore in others? Selfishness.
  5. Which living person do you most admire? My mother.
  6. What is your greatest extravagance?  Dining out.
  7. What is your current state of mind? Preoccupied.
  8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue? Patience.
  9. On what occasion do you lie? To keep the magic in my kids’ lives. My 10-year-old still believes in Santa.
  10. What do you dislike most about your appearance? My belly.
  11. Which living person do you most despise? I can’t think of a particular individual I despise, other than general groups, like murderers, rapists, terrorists.
  12. What is the quality you most like in a man? The ability to listen to a woman.
  13. What is the quality you most like in a woman? Strength.
  14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse? “Really?” and “Fuck.”
  15. What or who is the greatest love of your life? My children.
  16. When and where were you happiest?  In a hospital bed, immediately after giving birth to two health babies.
  17. Which talent would you most like to have? To play piano.
  18. If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be? To be less selfish.
  19. What do you consider your greatest achievement? Raising kind children.
  20. If you died and came back as a person or thing what do you think it would be? A cat.
  21. Where would you most like to live? Hawaii.
  22. What is your most treasured possession? An old bird toy that was my grandmother’s before it was mine. I was fascinated by it when I was a child, and after she died it was the only thing of hers that I received.
  23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery? The loss of all hope.
  24. What is your favorite occupation? Giving advice about trivial matters.
  25. What is your most marked characteristic? I am vocal.
  26. What do you most value in your friends? Loyalty.
  27. Who are your favorite writers? Flannery O’Connor, John Steinbeck, Ian McEwan, Stephen King.
  28. Who is your hero of fiction? Ramona Quimby.
  29. Which historical figure do you most identify with? Thomas Jefferson.
  30. Who are your heroes in real life? My parents, Oprah Winfrey, and people who risk their lives to help others.
  31. What are your favorite names? My kids’ names.
  32. What is it that you most dislike? Hard-boiled eggs.
  33. What is your greatest regret? Certain choices I made in my career path.
  34. How would you like to die? Elderly, with my children holding my hands as I pass.
  35. What is your motto? Never give up.

Vanity Fair has an interactive, abridged Proust Questionnaire you can take, if you’re up for the challenge (it’s surprisingly tough as far as introspection goes). It then compares your responses against those of celebrities who have answered the questionnaire, and tells you whom you most closely resemble.

My results?

VF results

Mwah mwah. I’m good with Ron “Opie/Richie Cunningham” Howard, but Arnold Schwarzenegger? Really?

Try it here...

…And then go read Louis C.K.’s hilarious answers to same.

Have you taken the Proust Questionnaire? Did any of your responses surprise you?

7 thoughts on “Another Taper Distraction: The Proust Questionnaire

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